Reveries and Passions
.PROFILE
sam.hsieh
twenty.two
biochem.uw
saved.by.Grace
.COMRADERY
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Monday, March 06, 2006
Learnin' to Breath...
i can safely say that the past few weeks have been miserable...as i felt my spiritual state waste away like tofu ice cream in the sun. the past little while i did not enjoy life too much as i was being suffocated by the grip of academia...reports, exams, assignments, exams, reports, job search...i've truly lost sight of the main purpose in life. i focused on no one else besides my own studies. i couldn't even eat a meal without the constant reminder of a lurking task that i needed to do or another section that i had to study for.
it was this time that i reached the epitome of self-centeredness. caring about no one but myself. however, His grace broke thru.
yesterday during service, God used a fellow sister who was recently baptized to speak volumes to my state of stupidity. she told me that this was her first time participating in a (protestant) communion on communion sunday. in worship she beamed so radiantly...i could almost see God's love just through her smile. the excitement from her during communion was ridiculously contagious as she was so eager to participate.
i was like...wow, when was the last time i was this EXCITED to be in the presence of God and fellowshipping with other believers? when was the last time i was so JOYFUL that i couldn't contain my smile? it's been too long, a day without God feels like an eternity in darkness.
***
had a talk with housemate last night...it's not so much of us getting stronger to fight temptations...cause no matter how strong we become we'll still have weaknesses. it's more of...asking God to change our character...so that temptatious situations will lose its appeal...as our new character seeks Him solely.
***
turn this heart of stone into a heart of flesh.
"as deep cries out to deep."