Reveries and Passions: 06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
.PROFILE
sam.hsieh
twenty.two
biochem.uw
saved.by.Grace
.COMRADERY
.PREVIOUS
Saturday, June 11, 2005
Consider this...
I have stopped working out and neglected all attempts to become ripped and chiseled since the beginning of the term. This is not because I am a lazy piece of cheesecake, nor is it because I've given up on becoming buff. No no no. Far from it. It is because I've come to the realization of something important: I've figured out the key to a lady's heart.
That's right. I've deduced from numerous observations and hypothetical scenarios played out in my head...and have come up with my first (and only) postulate to this incredible, irreputable discovery.
CHICKS DIG BLUBBER.
Bear with me for a moment before you run off and begin chugging down large tubs of butter. There's a reason to this ridiculous statement. Let me explain.
Part A of postulate #1: Chicks dig soft hearts
And no, I don't mean tenderized chicken/cow heart one may find in chinese medicinal soups, rather...it is a man with a sensitive heart. I know it's not very kosher for a man of my calibre to say something like this...but guys need to get in touch with their "emotions".
"Oh my lentes!!!" you may react, but tis' true. A man unruly of his feelings will be feeling-less towards his gf/spouse...which in turns translate to a stiffled relationship which in turns translate to cold shoulders and a cold dinner. Dinner...speaking of food....
Part B of postulate #1: Chicks dig soft stomachs
After doing a survey on two ladies, 50% of all women would prefer to have a bf/husband with some baby fat. It's statistically proven! Lemme explain.
When you walk into a gym, you see a bunch of butch guys. Great. So what? But as one gets more and more butch, one becomes more and more self-conscious and self-centered. Ladies don't dig that. One must not be so enamored with oneself that one forgets who one is with. Thus, if you have a soft tummy, you won't be so caught up in your own abdominal area.
Thus conclude the most sought after theorem. That is...of course, next to the theorem of creating theorems.
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
I have now come out of blogging retirement to vent about school.
School suxxors. School for four months in the summer suxxors. School for four months in the summer suxxors like a truckload of boogers. School for four months in the summer suxxors like a truckload of boogers undergoing a Grignard reaction in the presence of water (ie. an impossibility for the corresponding carboxylic acid to be formed).
And we're done.